What Your Shadow Self is Hiding From You & How You Can Uncover it
Shadow work is one of the most challenging yet most healing work that you can do for yourself.
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Shadow work is based on the idea that each of us has a shadow self. Our shadow selves are made up of the parts of ourselves that we don’t like and as a result try to hide from others and from ourselves. Parts of ourselves that we may try to hide include character flaws, bad habits, overwhelming fears, and most often things that we feel ashamed or guilty of.
In an attempt to keep these unwanted aspects of ourselves in the shadows we suppress them far beyond the surface of our essence. They get shoved so deep into our subconscious that it is hard to tell when something triggers it because we don’t want to make the connection. If we make the connection we have to admit we did something wrong or are not perfect.
But our shadow selves exist for a reason. They are a result of our past and the methods we have learned to protect ourselves with — our shadows have a purpose.
However, we protect ourselves using unhealthy behaviors so we can continue to suppress what we don’t want to feel. These behaviors include, but are not limited to, avoiding, projecting, numbing (procrastination, addiction, self-destructive behaviors), and other unhealthy behaviors that stop our souls from growing and accepting what we deserve.
These behaviors aren’t just for show; they present themselves in the way they do for a very good reason. They can be used to understand the root of our pain and lead us to our missing puzzle piece and the key to our healing.
But like I said earlier, shadow work is challenging. Not because it is impossible to do or because it is hard to access but because our shadow selves have been hidden for a reason. Revealing them and uncovering the truth to our pains mean bringing up emotions and thoughts that we have a hard time getting in touch with.
Our shadow selves protect us from feeling any uncomfortable emotions towards the most sensitive parts of ourselves and our experiences. Bringing out the part of ourselves hidden in the shadows goes against everything our ego has ever said to us. Those who have big egos may have a harder time with shadow work because it involves being honest with yourself rather than running and faking confidence.
But please don’t let this scare you off. Shadow work is about being honest so I have to be honest with you. It will burst the bubble of your false self and that is scary because it’s always been your protection. But if you really truly want to live your brightest, most loving, and authentic life let yourself feel some pain so you can move forward.
Practicing shadow work has the potential to heal you in miraculous ways if you are willing to be vulnerable and allow yourself the opportunity of a better life than you are living right now.
Hope is not lost, your shadow is just hiding it from you. If you release the burden your shadow is carrying by learning to accept your flaws and mistakes the light of life will find you.
So how can you start your own shadow work?
First, you have to notice when you need to engage in shadow work. Times that would be most helpful are when you are experiencing a lot of uncomfortable and/or intense emotions, something brings up emotions you don’t understand, small things trigger you a lot, you overreact to arguments with others, or you notice yourself engaging in any of the unhealthy behaviors previously mentioned.
After this, it is time to really poke your shadow self and uncover your key to healing! Here is a great list of questions that you can ask yourself and write about (get 20% off the official template by Peppi Bay journaling by using my code found at the bottom) :
- How are you feeling?
- What causes this response?
- What is this bringing up for you?
- What is your ego saying?
- What limiting beliefs are you holding about this?
- What is this mirroring back at you? What shame is this touching on?
- Who’s shame is this & why was it put on you? Is it yours to carry?
- What beliefs would you like to replace your limiting beliefs with?
- What can you tell the triggered part of you to soothe it (inner child)?
- What does your highest self sound like in this situation?
It may be uncomfortable to sit down and write out the answers to these questions but it will be worth it to feel lighter, freer, and more accepted by yourself.
It’s okay to break down your walls and admit that you may be in the wrong. You are not a victim, you are a survivor. Uncover your truths and step into the real you by starting shadow work today.
Sincerely,
Skylar Rae🌻❤️
Want to start your shadow work now but are still unsure of how to start?
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